As has become a tradition for The Lamron’s executive board (e-board), we take time to check in with one another and let our true sentiments gush forth from the pits in which they’ve morbidly festered.

Listen, I know a lot of people think I’m just jealous of her because she somehow managed to pull Edward Cullen last year, but I swear this isn’t about that. Bella Swan is just… strange.

As an avid horror enjoyer, there are many things that I believe could have been avoided in horror movies if the characters weren’t so goddamn naive and just plain stupid. A lot of the shit that happens in these movies could have been avoided if protagonists had minded their damn business, but nooooo, everybody has to be a hero nowadays. That’s bullshit, save yourself bitch!

A few years ago, there was a popular meme within the Pokémon community about whether one of every Pokémon could beat one billion lions. Unless you have zero knowledge of Pokémon, I think it’s pretty obvious that the lions would lose. Sure, the wild cats have the numbers advantage, but what the fuck are they gonna do when rows of Pikachu use thunderbolt on the battlefield?

Another day, another liberal ruining it. People don’t want to talk about it, but I have been personally victimized by every person who voted for that bitch Kamala— and she didn’t even win. I know Trump is making some progress, and yet I still find every moment of my life made more shitty by a liberal idiot with blue hair and pronouns.