The Messy Bitch Museum: Where influencer drama lives forever
Photo courtesy of Wikimedia Commons
Attention all cunty icons: The Messy Bitch museum will be opening soon! Go be your true self there!
Since the existence of social media platforms such as YouTube and TikTok, there have been trillions of influencers and content creators apologizing for scandals they created. The scandals and cancellations usually go like this: one ridiculously rich person does something to another ridiculously rich person, they make videos about each other, and then the internet goes batshit crazy— either choosing a side or revealing more information on why these influencers should be canceled.
The internet usually forgets about past scandals and cancellations as soon as a new one comes along, but thankfully, this will no longer be the case. Recent new sites announce the opening a new museum in none other than Los Angeles, California, that will showcase all of your favorite internet scandals! The museum declared, after much anticipation, that it will be called the Messy Bitch Museum.
Due to the billions of existing scandals, this museum towers 180 stories high, each floor featuring hundreds of scandals you, your friends— or enemies —can walk through. The Messy Bitch Museum, yet, is not like those other, boring museums. The exterior consists of hot pink walls with glitter and rhinestones, plastered in cheetah print and animated billboards flashing viral memes, headlines, and scandalous quotations from featured influencers and content creators.
As you enter the Messy Bitch Museum, there will be a touchscreen pad with a list of all those who created scandals inside, and there, the visitors— or icons, shall I say —can vote on which scandal was their favorite.
While inside the museum, you will notice that there are different exhibits and hallways dedicated to those who entertained us the most.
One hall, labeled “Viral Moments,” showcases the scandals that had viewers simultaneously shooketh and on the edge of their seats. If you are wondering which of your favorite scandals is represented in this room, consider the infamous James Charles and Tati Westbrook scandal in 2019. In this scandal, Tati and James go back and forth via Youtube videos, persuading their subscribers to think they are not liars. Truthfully, the only interesting part of this scandal is Tati’s video titled “BYE SISTER” and James’s fake cry as a response.
Another interactive hallway is called the “Backlash Room,” where icons will see how viewers reacted to the scandals, including the excessive backlash these influencers received. This room will be filled with wall-length screens, and every two minutes, it will fill up with different reactions to the scandals showcased.
A hallway, “Exposed Wall of Shame,” also displays the most eye-catching and interesting controversies. Since I am cool, I heard insider information that one of these walls will consist of David Dobrik's downfall in 2021, which he never really recovered from (lol). Ever wonder why David’s vlogs were so short? Maybe he was cutting out so much fucking footage because he did not want anyone else to see how problematic it was. I guess the Teslas and sponsorships were more important than the choices and bodies of women.
Anyway, the last hallway I have cool-insider knowledge of is the “Apology Hall.” This is where you will see all the best— and worst —influencer apology videos. Although, from what I have seen so far, it mostly consists of Trisha Paytas on her kitchen floor eating chicken tenders while apologizing— again. Within this hallway, you, icons, can rate the apology on a scale of one through ten on how sincere you think it is— ten being the highest. I have a feeling there will be many ones scored, but who am I to judge?
Personally, I am so excited to book my plane ticket and see the Messy Bitch Museum, and you should be too. The museum will open in July 2025, and tickets will be given out to those who can make the best apology video. I cannot wait to see all you icons there!