Building muscle isn’t exclusively for men

For many of you I hope that the title of this article seems totally obvious, right? Unfortunately, it’s quite apparent that there are also a lot of people who think otherwise. The inspiration for this article comes after an instance that I experienced at the gym the other day, where someone very loudly proclaimed his disgust with girls that are “too” muscular, further claiming women just shouldn’t lift weights. 

As a woman who lifts, I found this particularly offensive. I was of course already aware of all the hate powerlifting and body-building women get, but hearing it so loud and clear in person really got to me. This hate stems completely from gender norms and the male gaze, which is described as “a way of portraying and looking at women that empowers men while sexualizing and diminishing women” by Sarah Vanbuskirk. Of course, both are completely made-up standards that need to be torn down.

Muscular women are often deemed as “too masculine,” as they defy what it means to be a “pretty woman” according to the male gaze. I’m sure most are aware of this standard—petite, but of course with a large bust and nice butt—which, on top of being unrealistic, is completely made-up! Beauty is subjective and it is ridiculous to put the standard of beauty into a tiny box that very few can even attain. 

In regard to muscular women, it seems to me this hate also comes from fragile version of masculinity, where men aren’t able to handle a woman being as strong or even stronger than they are, because women are supposed to be weak, right? Wrong, and it’s absurd to demean women for their ability to gain strength and build muscle. Now, if you don’t find someone attractive, that’s fine, but who cares! That doesn’t call for belittling them—simply mind your own business and go about your life.

Delving into it even further, hating on muscular women really goes back to norms of women being submissive and fragile, which contributes to this standard of petiteness. Men lose their feelings of power and dominance when women step outside of this standard. As time goes on, women have been able to gain more of their independence rather than need to rely on men, and I believe this is consciously or subconsciously upsetting to men. Their loss of control and fractured masculinity then causes them to hate on women’s appearances. But, news flash, women don’t just exist for men! 

It’s way past due to just let these ridiculous standards go and let people do as they please with whatever appearance they may have. I’ll say it again—beauty is subjective! What you truly find attractive probably isn’t what the next person does, and all beauty standards do is work to demean and oppress people.

So, to all the women who lift and want to gain muscle—including myself—you don’t need validation from fragile men to be beautiful. I know this is going to sound corny, but every one of us is beautiful in our own way. Let’s put gender norms and standards of the male gaze in the trash, because that’s where they belong!