Writer’s Spotlight: Haider Ali Tahir

The Beast

The sunrise breached through the kitchen windows, shining and prancing through the dimly lit room and dancing all the way to Lisha’s eyes, burning her while they pressed open on her dried-out eyes. She slowly got up from the floor she had sat on for an hour or two, patting herself down and wiping the wetness from under her eyes and face. The floorboards creaked across the empty house as she looked around at the elegant white kitchen that shined brightly with the smell of the ingredients for her breakfast laid across on the counter in front of her.

She was staring at them all: a few onions, tomatoes, chicken, seasonings like garam masala, some chicken tikka masala, garlic powder, onion powder, soy sauce, and sesame oil, to just name a few. They all were placed around the brightly-colored marble counter, along with the metal pots and pans, all brand new and unused. She avoided looking in the middle of them all, knowing it would trigger the emotions again, but she had to look at it. 

There it was, the kitchen knife sitting right in front of her, shining the brightest, pleading to take it and use it. It shined brightly to mock her emotions. Mocking her life, mocking her pain. As it just lay there, playing with her mind.

It laid flat on the counter right in the middle. Being the main special of all the items, cast by the spotlight of the sunshine as it gleamed at her eyes. Calling out to her. 

She stared intently at the knife. Knowing she had to pick it up sooner or later, everyone was coming over in an hour for the ceremonial feast before the wedding. The food needs to be ready, as everyone will enjoy the presence of it all and be cheery. They will all be laughing and have no care in the world. Being indulged for the upcoming wedding, while Lisha would stand to the side and watch them all as she would be left alone with her darkness.

She looked to the corner of her eyes and saw a picture of the family photo she and her kids had taken with their father on the last Christmas they celebrated just before the accident had taken them all. Leaving her alone in the hollow house for so long. 

She looked back; the knife's shining edge glowed with life. The sun’s glare flared with a mighty orange fire, its sharp edge defined by the contrast of its glow and the dark shadow behind it. A flaming sword that beckoned Lisha to use it, cutting everything and anything in its path, even her.

Lisha hovered over to the knife as its pull tugged on her body, urging her to be possessed by its power. Leaning over the cool counter, she lifted her left hand, shaking over its hilt, fear striking her body over and over. Begging her to stop her. The trauma that it had felt before can’t be felt again. Her blood pumped through her rapidly as her heart cried out. 

She finally gripped the beast while still trembling with massive fear. Her hands shook uncontrollably as she pointed the knife in the air. Glaring down the beast, knowing that it would easily overcome her today. 

As she stared intently at the beast, she looked at her family photo. Her two kids. Josh and Kaylee. She could finally see them. Tears dripped down into her mouth, salting her taste buds as she held her breath. Of course, they would want to see their mother, but not like this.

Glaring down at the beast, she felt its power but knew her own will too. It could not win today, not ever. She will be the one in control from now on. Nothing else, no thoughts to tempt her. No furious anger for her to lash out. No more fear of bearing the guilt. It would be just herself in control.

She placed the beast to the ground, cracking its neck against a rock and forcing it to slice through it. It opened the rock up as its layers portrayed a beauty that made her weep—repeating the motion a couple more times as the rock finally cut into many tiny pieces. It was done; the beast had been overcome for this one task. She smiled slightly as if she could have a chance.

She grabbed the ripe tomatoes, slamming them to the white counter before spilling their juices all over it. Its blood oozed onto the counters, painting over their original design. Forcing the knife to sway with her, she diced the tomatoes even smaller and smaller with each cut. Splattering more of the blood on her. It spilled on her arms, but she remembered it wasn’t hers. As she calmed herself, she slowed her breath and knew she could finally tame the beast now. She was in control of its destruction. It couldn’t hurt her anymore. 

She picked it up to eviscerate the obstacles before her, destroying them all and cutting everything down. Then, going into a frenzy with the mood, dancing and prancing with the sun that beaded on her face, cheerfully playing with her eyes.

As she and the fragrances of the ingredients stride along the rhythm of her feet. She swayed back and forth with the beast as they worked together, slicing and dicing. Next, she picked up her glossy pan, dousing it with oil over a giant flame. Then, she finally placed her marinated chicken in there to cook. As the chicken simmered, its smell fizzed up and blessed her nose as it all tickled her nose and swum across the kitchen.

With time passing by quickly, her visitors came knocking on her door. She swung open her door, letting them in, joyfully welcoming everyone with a bright smile on her face. She led them to the kitchen, sat them down, and let them be engulfed by fragrances she had been cooking up. She was excitedly holding the knife in her hands.  

She made the last finishing touches to the dish, adding half and half, butter and some turmeric to let the chicken become a vibrant orange color. Tasting it all and perfecting its taste with some last touches of seasoning, she went out to the dining room, and the food was finally served. The feast went splendidly; Lisha hadn’t been this happy in a long time, looking down at the knife, the beast that had tormented her for almost three years.  After so long, she finally overcame the battle and breathed a huge sigh of relief. She was looking down at her arms and the past scars from their clashes. 

She took another deep breath, knowing this wouldn’t mean anything as her battle would return. It would return again. It will never go away, even if everyone thinks it will, just because she's happy. But she knew. It would. But one, the time would come. She would be able to tame the beast again. She did today. She can do it any day.